I’m still alive. Sort of.
Sep
2008
Damn. It’s been a while since I’ve updated this site….Greater than a month. And it’s going to be a while before I have anything of substance to add. I’ll get to it…eventually. But not anytime soon.
Simply put, the last month has been hell for me, and though things have gotten a lot better, I don’t have even the vaguest inclination to continue writing this stuff right now. I spent three days in the hospital in August when my small intestine decided to stop working again (third year in a row), and have been dealing with intermitent but debilitating attacks of extreme nausea just about every week since then. No one has any idea what’s wrong with my stomach, and I haven’t been able to see a doctor because everyone’s either so booked up or doesn’t take my insurance. I finally have an appointment this Thursday, and hopefully I’ll get to see a GI specialist soon in order to find out what the fuck is wrong with me. At least the nausea has lessened over the last two weeks.
I finally got a job, as a tech support geek with a local outsourcing contractor, and so far it’s been pretty cool—I’m only in training (that is, learning all kinds of technical stuff I already know, have known for nearly fifteen years), but there’s no stress nor bullshit to deal with, thank the Other Gods. Of course, I don’t get paid for nearly a month and don’t even have the money to pay for my fucking medications (I’ve borrowed nearly $3000 from my mother over the past months of unemployment just to pay for the shit that keeps me alive), but the job does promise to pay off eventually and certainly is enjoyable. But right now, it eats up nearly all of my time, so between not really feeling like writing anything and not having the time to do it even when I feel slightly inspired…well, stuff just isn’t getting done.
Once I’m out of training, I’ll have more time. Not much, but definitely more. And hopefully I won’t be spending too much of that time lying curled up on the floor of my bathroom while my stomach revolts just because I ate a single goddamned bean. Until then….Hell, I dunno. Read something else. I’ve managed to post a few things on my blog, and have been writing music reviews for the most excellent WeHeartMusic blog. But anything more substantial and eldritch is simply going to have to wait until I feel more capable of tackling something as intricate and massive as “City of Pillars” or “Trois Fréres.”
I noticed I’ve lost a lot of readers; my subscriber count is way down. *Shrug* Nothing I can do about that. These days, I’m having a very difficult time caring about this project myself.
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I actually don't RSS most of the blogs I visit 'cause it's more fun to go to them and check. I've been following you on Twitter and you didn't mention all this shit. All of this is to say, get better and I'm glad you're diggin' your job.
I still haven't re-read chapter four, so I've got no worries.
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You've always been on my RSS feeds and will remain so, no matter what. I pity the fool who doesn't understand that you're doing this because you like it, that it's not a job or a task to tick off and move on, and that it's not on any weekly or monthly schedule. And of course that you are giving us all that when you're not busy living out there. Or dying, as might be the case:)
Seriously though, I'm sorry to hear about the problems with your health. Speedy recovery, nothing else.
And don't worry about us: some of us may actually have some kind of life out there ("OMG! Is that even possible?!"), and maybe we fell behind on the City of Pillars, and maybe we can catch up in the meantime. You know, I'm just saying.
Take you time and don't give up, not on the Footnotes and especially not on anything in your life right now. Wait it out, the wheel is turning as we write.
And, by the Gods, we'll be here when you're ready! So say we all!
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I'm really sorry to hear about your ailments and the troubles you've been having. I hope you're able to work it all out and I wish you the best. You're an immense talent, but when life deals you a hand like this you've got to focus on making due with it and sometimes that means putting things on the back burner. My thought are with you.
Be Well,
Brandon
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I've got the site in my RSS feed and enjoy reading whatever pops up.
Take it easy!
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